Basics: Books on communication might not teach like this!


What is the most important act by which one shares and receives meaningful information through verbal and non-verbal means in our day-to-day lives? It is none other than ‘Communication’!

What you communicate tells also a lot about you than just the subject you are talking about.

Are you an efficient or a dull communicator?

In view of this, a meaningful communication is by which you should convey to the other person exactly the same way he interprets it.

To give you an example, you are sitting in a restaurant with your partner and you are on phone for a very long time, waiter suggests your partner, two of its restaurant’s signature dishes – Option A: ‘Bouillabaisse’ and Option B: ‘Skillet Roasted Chicken with Potatoes’. Your partner orders ‘Bouillabaisse’ and both of them turn to you, you make a gesture pointing out two fingers, the waiter nods. Ta-da! Your order comes in! It is ‘Skillet Roasted Chicken with Potatoes’ and you are forced to eat which you never ordered in the first place (you meant to wait for 2 more minutes and the waiter interpreted two fingers for your order which is Option B).

It is very important to focus on two things for a successful communication: first thing is what you want to communicate correctly and secondly whether the opposite person deciphers it accurately.

Going further, your communication is not restricted to just speech or writing. It is in the expression, by using gesture, the way you look at someone or something, body language, the posture, attire, tone, sound, tears, silence and even sign language.

  • The facial expression of the person changes when he finds out some truth about someone who has been hiding it.
  • The person, whom you are chatting with, stands with his feet apart means he is least interested in the conversation.
  • If a baby cries, it may mean that the baby is hungry or does not like being left unattended for a long time. If the baby has an abnormal pain, you will find the baby is crying with an arching back.
  • Your manager gives you a task which you have always disliked; you shrug your shoulders and leave. This is your response to show displeasure of being given low-key job to do.

From the above examples, it is very clear that communication is based using one or more purposes as stated below:-

  1. To educate people by sharing an information or ideas
  2. To express feelings
  3. To engage or have deeper connection
  4. To influence
  5. To achieve negative or positive reaction/action for fulfilling a need or needs

The communication will be more effective if the right means (mode) of communication is used to fulfill its purposes in a) our personal lives, b) social gatherings, places or community and c) professional world.

Would it sound appropriate if the family members (living inside the same house) were to communicate using emails and texts or using very friendlier, over-casual and informal ways to communicate in your office?

I am sure we all know about communication in a fragmented structure. The main purpose of writing this blog is to bring awareness why it is important to acquire and enhance communication skills by learning first about the basics of communication, its mode, its purposes and then going deeper into the topic in a more structured manner. I intend not to use bookish terminology to complicate things but make you understand in simple words at ease with live examples.

I would be writing more blogs on communication all that I have learnt in hard ways through its success and failures. So, keep watching this section!

Bye for now!


With best regards,

Jessie Velusamy

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